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Healthy and Happy Love Relationships. Originally written in 1986, and a free online guide to time-tested attitudes & tips since 2001.

Relationship Basics Review

So far, we’ve covered the most important basics associated with the beginnings of a relationship. If anyone tries to tell you they’re uncomfortable with you because you’re "trying too hard", there’s something I would like you to remember: If your efforts are genuine and sincere, the only reason someone would say that is because they feel they are incurring an obligation to you which they don’t feel they can or want to reciprocate. When someone feels that way, it would appear quite obvious they are not prepared to invest them self to the extent you are. This brings us to the end of the first part of this journal, wherein we’ve taken a look at the elements which come into play as a relationship is just beginning, and is trying to develop. But before leaving, let’s capsulize this section in point form for review purposes. •  Open communication is the beginning of balance •  Allow yourself to be human -- nobody’s perfect. •  Put your energy into realistic potential. •  Trust unless you are given valid reason not to. •  Be patient -- impatience is a trap. •  Be honest with yourself and your partner. •  Don’t expect more of yourself than you’d want your partner to, and vice versa. You gain self respect knowing you did your best to be your best. Don’t make excuses for one who doesn’t merit it. Talking of fears encourages bonding -- lessens stress. Simplify what you can and have more energy to deal with what you cannot.

BALANCE ... Always think in terms of balance.

INTENT can be your `reaction barometer’.

The relationship which works is the one in which BOTH people are prepared to play a meaningful, intrinsic, and growth oriented role in the other’s life -- without creating feelings of obligation or debt. In the next part of this booklet, we're going to talk about keeping it intact after it’s begun.
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If your heart is a volcano, how shall you expect flowers to bloom? — Khalil Gibran